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Making waves and group power

Submitted by on September 14, 2009 – 8:52 amNo Comment

shutterstock_34155481There are times in life when we  feel alone , wandering this way, that way,jumping over puddles, attached to no one, no place ,maybe no job or no purpose. You could be experiencing the ending of a life’s role – the empty nest – and struggling  to mask the pain of this situation, you could be a recent graduate, missing the daily life at Uni.,lost and not knowing where to turn for help. Some people try to cope by throwing themselves into busy,busy activities, having too many wines or  focussing on the future or dwelling in the past.

Feeling alone when tackling any changing situation can open the door to negativity if we allow ourselves to become disconnected from people and without hope for our future.

I have written before about the influence of our critical or negative voices  and found this excerpt from The Reluctant Buddhist by William Woollard quite thought provoking.

He writes:

‘Negativity however can disarm us,or render us immobile.  Our own problems always seem to have a uniquely difficult twist to them. There is never any shortage of costumes for us to dress our negativity in, our evil twin is a master of disguise.’

Of course if we keep listening to those carping, critical voices, the ones which tell us what we should or must do, the analytical, over logical blah blah, then most likely we will end up doing nothing, something rash and certainly not have acted upon the ache in our hearts. You know that the voices are taking effect when you feel heavy of heart and there is no real spring in your step. The parties you may go to only have but a little gloss and you never feel as if you quite belong, never quite at ease. There is no anchor.

I initially set up the lifechanging company  to help people deal with isolation when their jobs had been made redundant. When your job goes, you lose your daily routine, your colleagues and the daily chit chat and now find yourself on the outside without a daily structure. In the outplacement world it is well known that isolation is your biggest enemy when looking for a new job. You need to have contact with others and some fun, to keep your energy levels topped up, as well as a plan for job hunting tasks. Knowing this , in all our packages you get a spreadsheet with  the activities planned out over a two week period, just to give you a kick start.

There are various types of packaged service you can purchase , all of which will enable you to get support from us whilst you are going through these changes. The Silver package is aimed at small groups of people with input from myself via a teleconference link. For example, you could be a group of mothers who are looking to return to work , a group of students who want help and advice with C.V.’s. or just a group of people who want  a new direction  or have recently lost jobs. 

All you need to do is organise 4 – 6 people, contact me allie@life-changing.co.uk and we will go from there.

Don’t worry by the way, the conferencing system is easy to set up, I just give you a date, time and telephone number to call, your group doesn’t even need to be in the same room and we can still connect up. All the other support material is delivered online. Technology at its best!

Forming a group give you a chance to be encouraging and supportive to others, to share in problems and celebrate successes. They are also arenas for networking and the development of ideas helping you to give and get faster results and raise your feeling of wellbeing. It also gives you rehearsal time  for interview skills.

Professor Richard Layard in his book entitled  ‘Happiness’  makes ‘giving ‘a central plank in his argument for happiness. He says:

‘This needs to be at the core of moral education,so that ourchildren understand that what they give to life is more important than what they get from it. With that philosphy they will,in fact remain happier, as modern psychology shows’.

 So remember, you do not have to stay alone, join up and start making waves.

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